Hagioscope

Looks like this will be my last post on this blog, at least for a while. Band Name of the Day has clearly run its course with both writer and reader(s) over the past few years, so it's time to move on.

Where to?
Hagioscope, my new blog. http://hagioscope.blogspot.com.

Haggis-what?
Come on over and find out.

How is Hagioscope different from BND?

1. Hagioscope is a diary, not an essay blog. My posts may have a point/theme, or I may just ramble about whatever is on my mind. I may post several times in a day or nothing at all for a week. No format, no predictions, no promises.
   
2. No mailing list. Drop by only if you feel like it.
   

Why?
BND was a good writing exercise there for a while. I have some nice output to show for it. But if you do any kind of exercise the same way for too long, you plateau. I need to cross-train.

Anything else?
Thanks for reading. Keep in touch.

Taking Stock

The Media Sensation has not fallen off the face of the earth. Yeah, I know you were worried. Mmhm. What I have done, however, is used the new year as a prompt to step back and take stock of my writing life.

Capsule summary: Rut City.

The essay-a-day formula is old. Like, five years old. That's about how long I've been writing Band Name of the Day. I have a nice stack of output to show for it, and that's . . . nice. But it's no longer satisfying for its own sake. I want to write stuff people want to read. What that is, I don't know. Send hints if you've got 'em.

I'll likely continue blogging, but probably be in a different format. I will almost certainly discontinue the mailing list. Beyond that, my plans are wide open. Stay tuned.

image: Michael Cope

Home School

Brought to you by randomly firing synapses.

My parents told me a great many things when I was growing up. Most of the information was useful. In fact, I can’t think of much that wasn’t. (Okay, the part about broccoli being good simply is not true.) My folks are pretty dang sharp.

Periodically, when I catch myself thinking or doing something a certain way, I remember where I learned it. Here are a few notions that have been knocking around in my head lately.

From Mom

• Raise and lower a full glass slightly in time with your footsteps. The up-and-down motion will help neutralize the side-to-side sloshing, resulting in fewer spills. I think Mom learned this when she was a carhop at her local A&W trying not to spill root beer on her customers, but it works with hot tea, too.
  
• Use your butter knife, not your fingers, to push food onto your fork.
  
• If your date wants you to dress to match his car, he’s probably not your dream man.
  
• Peanut butter gets bubblegum out of long hair. Mother Media should know; my grade school friends and I all had long hair, loved grape Bubble Yum, and lived on the windy plains of the wild west.
  
• Cowboys don’t drink bathwater.
  
• “Fingers in your ears!” Mom always said this to a carload of kids prior to shutting the doors to make sure no one’s fingers got crunched. It's good to know where your fingers are.
  
• Tease gently or not at all.
  
• Learn to golf and play bridge so you can socialize with business associates. I’ve learned both and needed neither, but I have learned the value of knowing which topics help keep water cooler banter alive.
  
• Carry Kleenex in your purse. You never know when you’re going to need it.
  

From Dad

• If you start to skid while driving a stick shift, put the vehicle in neutral. It’s easier to control when the gears aren’t engaged.
  
• Use your wit to amuse, not to abuse. If you must snark, reserve it for the company of a few close friends whose discretion you trust.
  
• Travel light. Actually, Dad was infamous for carrying this one to extremes. As a college student, he embarked on one weekend jaunt with friends with nothing more than clean socks in his suitcase.
  
• Don’t send a letter you wouldn’t sign your name to. In other words, no anonymous rants to the editor of the local paper. No hate mail.
  
• Green olives bob up and down in beer. Try it.
  
• You don’t need a lot, you just need enough. Except when it comes to Christmas presents.
  
• “I’ll give you $1000 to elope.” Dad said this to me when I was in junior high. Perhaps I had just mentioned having a crush on a boy, prompting jokes about the expense of paying for a daughter’s wedding. I thought $1000 an astronomical sum at the time and didn’t give the remark much thought until it came time to plan my actual wedding. Poor Dad! And he didn’t even like the groom. If there’s ever a Wedding 2.0, I’ll do my best to keep it under a grand.
  
• Learn the rules of football so you’re not bored. Not only is this true, but if you’re actually into the game, you’re entitled to join in the chipping and dipping, too.
  
• The snake is just as scared as you are. While intellectually Dad knew this to be true, in practice he was prone to jumping and hollering, a tradition I proudly uphold.
  

Today around the world: January 9 is both Balloon Ascension Day and National Clean Off Your Desk Day in the U.S. Then you send your desk detritus up up and away, right?

Make It So

I intend 2006 to be a year of less for me: less bitching, less blather, less blogging when I should be working. So look for about a 90% reduction in my postings.

Since less is more, that means more real writing of the narrative or constructive kind, and more effort at getting my ya-yas out on paper where it'll do me some good. I've been lazy about these things lately.

Also:

- trying to force color into my wardrobe
+ black. Because I like it.

- careful
+ carefree

- surfing
+ getting off my butt

- butt
+ walking

- skipping T'ai Chi
+ private lessons

- sitting around the house
+ getting out. I will visit SD, AZ, NY, NV, GA and Italy at least once apiece this year.

- Ben
+ Jerry

- "Do it by self!"
+ "Thanks, I could use a hand."

- commentary
+ comments

- Dunkin' Donuts
+ Tim Duncan

- Gap
+ Nordstrom

- reliving yesterday
+ living today

- snark
+ spark

- caring about what people think
+ caring about people

- CNN
+ CNE

- GWB
+ GWB III

- driving
+ biking

- dissonance
+ harmony

- face
+ grace

- ( ! ) That's an e-posterior.
+ \m/ That's e-rock-n-roll "horns."

Imagination becomes reality. Make it so.