03/18/04’s illustrious band:
Map Light
Brought to you by MarsCon 2004.
Did you think I’d forgotten you? No, no, you’re not getting away so easily. I’m still blogging along. I’ve just been busy recently with a four-day seminar followed by catch-up time at work. But I’m back in the groove now. So here we go.
A perennial feature of the sci-fi conventions I’ve attended is the musical entertainment. As you’d expect, you can hear sci-fi movie themes played by fannish musicians in robot suits and haunting odes to dragon love (don’t ask) wailed by comely lasses on hiatus from the nearest Renaissance festival. At midnight there’s usually a drum jam where you can bang out some otherworldly rhythms or practice your belly dancing.
There’s also a large comedy music component, in which the musicians may replace familiar lyrics with more Hobbit- or Star Wars-oriented words, a la Weird Al Yankovic’s timeless classic Yoda, sung to the tune of Lola. When heavily laden with puns and in-jokes, these works are called filksongs; to sing them at a rum-fueled after-hours room party is to filk. A filksong usually has twice as many verses as the original, and you can bet each and every one of them is gonna get sung.
Sometimes the artists compose original tunes that poke loving fun at various geek icons, or compose original silly songs that have nothing whatsoever to do with science, science fiction, fantasy, or role-playing games. Such is the case with this year’s one-off hit, Turn Off the G*dd*mn Map Light, written and performed by the Great Luke Ski with some help from his friends, the three guys who comprise the Worm Quartet. (The Great Luke Ski is also the author of last year’s infamous Hobbit rap Golleminem.)
Mr. Ski travels to numerous cons around the region, usually by car, usually accompanied by his long-suffering wife Steph. Map Light is the musical version of the conversation they have when he’s driving long distances at night and she won’t turn off the offending illumination until she has finished eating her burger, cleaning her purse, fixing her hair, etc. Both tempo and volume increase as the “discussion” wears on. It’s a pretty good song, as songs about map lights go, and the chorus is catchy: “Turn off the g*dd*mn map light!” Just chant it four times in a row, with feeling.
Reaction roundup on a scale of 1 to 10
Sci-fi relevance: 4 -- highest relevance rating yet!
Entertainment value: 6 to 8, dependent upon whether you’re already a fan of the performer
Number of other songs about map lights that I know of: 0
Number of other songs about map lights that I’d like to hear: 2
Average cup size of the men performing this song: C
Today around the world: March 18 is Men’s Day in Mongolia. You go, boys!
Visit the BND archives at http://jugglernaut.blogspot.com.
posted by Jugglernaut at 4:33 PM
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