03/09/04’s illustrious band:

The Embellished Bra

Brought to you by MarsCon 2004.

Every sci-fi convention I’ve attended has included a large contingent of belly dancers. I’m not sure why. Most likely they’re sci-fi fans who also happen to enjoy belly dancing and dressing up in exotic costumes, same as the Jedi knights and Hobbits. They’re also assured of a generous reception at cons, because an audience that accepts multicolored, multilimbed alien life forms as de rigueur isn’t going to blink at women who bare their bellies to dance, even if they’re not “swizzle sticks” (as I heard one fan refer to contestants on America’s Next Top Model). And these ladies aren’t.

MarsCon was no different. In fact, one of the guests of honor this year was a woman named Dawn Devine “Davina” Brown, who teaches Middle Eastern dance and costume design. I skipped her workshop on “the embellished bra,” not being much of a seamstress myself (OK, I missed out on a Girl Scout merit badge in sewing because I couldn’t sew the badges on my sash). However, I’ve long been intrigued by the moves and by the rhythms of the music, so I did attend a session on beginning belly dancing. Here’s what I learned.

1. The hips are where it’s at, so tie something around yours so you know where they are. For Davina, that meant a scarf hung with hundreds of tiny metal disks. For me, it was a jacket.

   
   

2. Bend your knees a little and use your legs to shake what you’ve got. Don’t worry if it keeps on shaking after your legs have stopped. Nobody cares.

   
   

3. When you bump your hip out toward the audience, lift and turn it a little so your fringe/coins/sweatshirt sleeves accentuate the movement. When you sway, let your hands echo the motion.

   
   

4. Choose men in the audience upon whom to focus your attention, for just a few moments at a time. Make eye contact. Flirt outrageously. Want to shimmy your shoulders? Bosom? Bottom? It’s all good. If you’re not sure, just watch the object of your affection changing color and squirming in his seat.

   
   

5. Making a figure eight with your rear end while walking to the beat and mastering arm motions is really hard. Save that for the second class.

   
   

6. If you’re bending forward toward the audience, coyly cross your arms in front of you to give “the girls” some coverage, unless you want to risk popping out of that embellished bra, or want viewers to think you might.

   
   

7. Come on, keep shaking it.

   
   

8. Take a bow. Wasn’t that fun?

   
   

Yes, it was fun. And I used some side abdominal muscles that I don’t usually use. Had we done more dancing and less talking, I would have considered it good exercise, but time and space, even at a sci-fi con, were limited. I may have to purchase a CD of those groovin’ tunes and practice at home.

Reaction roundup on a scale of 1 to 10

Sci-fi relevance: 0

Entertainment value: For me as I was giving it a try, 8; for those watching, apparently 9.5. Plenty of cameras in play. I regret to say that a friend of mine, Captain Steve, may have captured portions of my debut on film. Don’t get your hopes up, though; I have some blackmail material on him, too.

Entertainment value for those focusing on the male Klingon warrior who joined the class: 11. Who knew belly dancing could be so macho? Or involve so much leather?

Likelihood you’ll catch me belly dancing in public: 4

In costume: 2

Today around the world: March 9 is Baron Bliss Day in Belize (formerly British Honduras). Baron Bliss was an Englishman who left his home country to spend his last days in Caribbean comfort. Although he never set foot on land in Belize, and in fact died within two months of reaching its waters, he was so impressed with the beauty and hospitality that greeted him in Belize that he decided to leave the country the bulk of his fortune.

E-mail the Media Sensation: BandNameoftheDay@hotmail.com

Visit the BND archives at http://jugglernaut.blogspot.com.