04/10/03’s illustrious band:

Butt Sad

A cautionary tale about when slang goes bad, brought to you by the Chicken Step Lady.

Once upon a time, there was a teenage girl of Chicken Step Lady’s acquaintance whose adverb of choice was “butt.” She used “butt” they way one might use “very,” to intensify other descriptions. For example, if something were very ugly, she’d call it butt ugly; for very funny, she said butt funny. (No argument there.)

One day the girl saw the movie Schindler’s List, a deeply moving tale of survival during the Holocaust, with a group from her school. As the young people emerged from the theater, all of them upset, many weeping, she wailed into her Kleenex, “That was butt sad!”

And despite themselves, everyone began to laugh.

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